I always had a feeling that there must be more in life than going to school, working, cooking and cleaning, but this is what my mom always did and I thought that this is what I am supposed to do. I believed that life is designed like that and the only difference between people is social status. Our family didn’t hold any special status and I thought about myself as ugly, too short, too fat, I didn't like myself at all.
I started to feel uncomfortable in my life and felt that something was missing. I didn’t want to copy my parents' life, I wanted something different. It took me a long time to understand that we get bound by our parent's ideas of who we are supposed to be. We get programmed by teachers, church leaders, and television stars that we listen to and let their point of view sink in our minds. We lose our identity when we agree to follow someone else's vision. I did this, which led me to make horrible decisions. I cried out for help, love, and attention, I was looking for happiness outside of myself and I couldn't find it.
Growing up in Eastern Europe had a big impact on my belief system.
I didn’t feel like I had a voice. Then my family and I immigrated to Canada.
We had more freedom but I didn’t speak English at all….it was frustrating and I felt worthless and lost. I felt like I don’t belong anywhere. That emotional roller-coaster was killing me slowly and I didn’t know who I was and what I am doing here on planet earth.
I was living my life in misery, thinking that I was born into the wrong story, on top of it health problems and menopausal symptoms started to show up. I was sore, exhausted, hot, and uncomfortable.
I didn't know what to do to make it better. Sounds familiar?
For years, I couldn't find the way back to being ME again, but I knew in my heart that it is the only way to regain peace, happiness and health.
We have to follow our hearts and desires to feel happy and satisfied with our lives. After hundreds of books and webinars, and courses with holistic teachers and coaches, I realized that I could write my own story. I could choose the details of my story; I just had to rewrite my programming.
After hundreds of books and webinars, courses with holistic teachers and coaches I finally started living MY life.
Was it easy? No, not at all, but it was so satisfying to be born again with the new blueprint, and it is always a work in progress. It is never done because life is not constant. When I remove some of the beliefs that I got from my upbringing environment and started to love my magnificent body and myself as a whole I finally started living MY life and enjoying the journey.
Self-Love and complete acceptance of who I am were critical to gain confidence, being courageous, strong, and truly living a life of freedom.
Now I am writing my fairy tale story, and I take total responsibility for it. Owning my story and loving myself through that process is the bravest thing I did.
If you are looking for inspiration, come hang out with me! I look forward to share the journey with you, and I would LOVE to hear about your journey or your questions!